Not a Year
by ladyofeverything
Summary: Less than a year into his marriage, Robert quite unexpectedly discovers that he is in love with his wife. 1/1.


**_A/N:_**_ This piece just sort of came to me the other day, so I decided to write it. It's just a little one off from Robert's point of view._

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Robert was perfectly aware it was not good behaviour to stare, even if the object of his attention was his own wife. Seeing the attention that she was receiving from everyone around her, however, it was hard not to. Robert wasn't really sure what else he had been expecting. It was, after all, their first season in town after a much talked about engagement a little under a year earlier. Of course everyone wanted to see the American heiress who, since they had last seen her, had become a Viscountess, and of course she would be admired just like she had been the year before. Even more so now that she had a title to add grace to her natural beauty and charm.

All of that Robert had been fully prepared for. He had even anticipated a sense of pride in being able to present Cora to the society as his wife, for he was certain that out of all of his peers who had married since the previous season, there were none who had made as fortunate and well suited a match as he had. He counted himself to be a lucky man indeed, because not only had he secured the money to save Downton, he had done so without ending up with an unpleasant wife like so many of the men he knew.

And yet, somewhat inexplicably, it was a nagging feeling of displeasure that Robert could not account for that seemed to be dominating his evening of triumph. At first it had been only a gnawing sensation of annoyance somewhere in the pits of his stomach as Lord Asher had come to pay his overflowing compliments to Cora upon their arrival, but the feeling had soon grown into full blown frustration as she had been swept away by their common acquaintances, leaving him behind to watch and listen to second-hand compliments on how lovely his wife truly was.

What should have made him beam with pride, though, made him instead throw dirty looks at all the men expressing their admiration, and what should have been a satisfying evening of seeing his wife so well received, soon turned into an evening of dull dissatisfaction that seemed to be of his own making as he simply could not enjoy himself.

There would have been no need to feel sour. Robert had many friends in town, and more than one even in attendance at the very same gathering, but seeking company for himself would have meant losing sight of Cora, and that was a notion Robert suddenly found insupportable.

His eyes followed her as she worked the room with all the ease that was expected of her, and they were fixed on her face every time someone was able to draw a smile or even a bout of laughter from her.

Finally Robert was forced to exercise some self-control and take a moment to inspect the tapestry on the wall so as not to appear a complete buffoon, but it was all he could do to keep himself in check when sounds of merry conversation kept reaching his ears from across the room, his ears always distinguishing her voice from the general noise of the crowded room.

It was a form of torture that Robert had never known before – to be so acutely aware of another person and yet seemingly of so little consequence himself to that same person. She had not even once returned to his side once they had been separated, and the realization that this actually bothered him immensely was a startling discovery for Robert.

As if working on their own accord, his eyes drifted back to Cora, whose face was now turned completely away from him as she stood conversing with a young man and woman of approximately her own age. Robert let out a sigh. At Downton he never had to compete for Cora's attention. All he needed to do was step into a room she was in and her eyes would fall on him immediately, and even if she was in conversation with someone else, she would welcome him with a warm smile.

But what else was there at Downton to compete against him? Anyone would look happy to see him after spending two hours doing needlework with his mother. They had been married for several months now and apart from their honeymoon, all those months had been spent at Downton. Was it any wonder that he had grown to take her smiles for granted when there was no one else for her to bestow them on?

It seemed Cora had become part of his life without him really even realizing when or how it had happened. As Robert cast his mind back to the months passed, he could not tell at what point the pretty American girl who he had married for her money had become the woman he looked forward to seeing every day, taking out for walks, or reading novels to when they were left to spend an evening on their own. Hers was the face he sought whenever entering a room, and it was only now that he had a hard time catching her eye in return that he realized it was so – and indeed had been so for some time now.

She wasn't just his wife anymore. She was his companion. She was his Cora.

As the realization hit Robert, he felt his knees buckle, and had to quickly withdraw from the heat and noise of the room to reflect on what had just occurred to him. How long had he been so blind? The French windows opening out to a secluded garden proved to be a salvation, and he slipped out quietly into the cool night air to find some privacy.

Once alone, Robert took in a deep breath and brushed his hand through his hair while taking a few hurried steps back and forth. The pieces that hadn't seemed to fit began falling in place quickly.

He had been a first class fool. He had stood there all evening like an idiot, feeling disgruntled for reasons he could not account for when the reason had been standing right before his eyes the whole time. There was a simple word for what he had been feeling, and it was called jealousy.

He had been jealous of her attention. Not of the attention she was receiving, but of the attention she was giving to others.

Robert stopped pacing and suddenly a silly grin replaced the frown on his face as the further implications of his jealousy began to dawn on him.

"I love her," he whispered, the words coming out of his mouth before he could even think to stop them. In fact, once the realisation begun to sink in, he rather felt inclined to shout the words from the rooftop, if he only could climb up there.

His next inclination naturally was to burst back inside and shout it to the room full of people, but that too was an idea that could never be executed in reality.

Robert continued pacing and one thought soon spurred others in his mind. Did Cora even love him back? He had never questioned it as long as they had been married because it had been of no real interest to him. He had known she had favoured him when they had married, and it had pleased him, but what if in the following months she had come to realize there was nothing extraordinary about him after all? What if she was only happy to be in town because it meant she could meet other people? Sinking down on a garden bench, Robert covered his face with his hands. How could he bear it if his foolishness had already cost him her love?

Before these thoughts could plague him further, Robert was startled by the sound of his own name being called from near the window he had just stepped out of.

"Robert?" It was Cora.

He looked up, smiling involuntary at his intruder when their eyes met. She had reached his bench quickly.

"Are you unwell?" she asked, a look of concern on her face. "You left so suddenly."

Still all Robert could do was smile at her. She had noticed him leaving and come to find him.

"Oh Cora," he finally managed to breathe out, taking her hand left hand into his and gently toying with her fingers.

This unexpected behaviour did not appear to appease Cora. If anything, she looked more concerned as she brought her right hand up to his forehead to check his temperature.

"You don't seem feverish," she muttered, letting her hand slide down his face. The action caused Robert to take in a sharp breath. How he enjoyed her touch.

"I'm better than I've ever been," he then said, not letting go of Cora's other hand. He had now reached her ring finger. His face grew serious and he indicated for Cora to sit down next to her. She did so wordlessly, as if afraid of what he might say.

"Cora…" Robert began, not sure how to express himself. He had not felt this nervous even when he had proposed to her. "Do you know how happy you have made me, as my wife?"

Cora blushed at his words. Whatever she had been expecting, this was clearly not it, and she appeared to bet at a loss for words.

"Because you have," Robert continued, tilting her head with his free hand so that their eyes met again. "So very happy."

"You have made me happy too, Robert," Cora replied, her voice catching in her throat as she spoke.

"Have I?" Robert asked, his heart pounding. "Truly, have I made you happy?"

Cora smiled, a little sadly he thought, and looked down.

"You have been a very good husband," she replied. It was not a direct answer to his question.

"That's not what I meant," Robert said softly. "I want…" He paused, looking at Cora intently. "I want you to know that your happiness means everything to me and if there is anything I can do to make you happier, please tell me."

"Robert, there is truly nothing that you haven't done for me already, and I'm very grateful for it," Cora replied with a tender look in her eyes as she touched his cheek gently. "The one thing that would make me happier than anything else is not something that can be asked for."

Robert was sure that by now the pounding of his heart could be heard even inside the house.

"If you cannot ask for it, can you at least name it?" he asked, now taking both of Cora's hands into his.

Cora blushed, looking down at their joined hands. She shook her head.

"You will think it's silly."

"Please, Cora," Robert begged, wishing she would look at him again but unwilling to let go of her hands to lift her chin.

She took in a deep breath and let the air blow out of her lungs.

"Your love," she finally said softly, almost inaudibly. Then she looked up at Robert again. "I know it's not something that can be given like a gift, but you asked me to name what would make me happy."

Robert face lit up. This was almost too good to be true.

"How about an exchange then?" he asked hopefully. "My love for your love?"

"Please don't mock me," Cora replied, averting her eyes again. "My love is already yours," she added quietly.

Robert could no longer hold back his smile. If there had been times in his life he had thought he was happy, this moment made them all pale in comparison.

"Then we are already even," he replied, freeing one of his hands to touch Cora's face, gently guiding her to meet his eyes again. "Cora, please look at me."

She did as he asked and there were tears shining in her eyes when she looked at him in disbelief.

"I love you, Cora," Robert said, gently caressing her soft cheek.

Slowly, the disbelief on Cora's face started to give way to other emotions.

"D-do you really?" she asked, placing her hand on top of his over her cheek. "But..."

"With all my heart," he replied earnestly, entwining their fingers.

A lot more could have been said by them both, and Robert looked forward to one day sitting down with Cora to map out the progress of his falling in love with her, but at that moment no further words seemed necessary as the most important ones had already been spoken. Robert pulled Cora into his embrace and for a long time they simply sat there in silence, looking at the stars, until Robert could feel a shiver run through Cora's body. The evening was chilly and despite his warm embrace, she had to be freezing.

"Are you cold, my love?" he asked in a hushed tone.

"I could never be cold while you're holding me like this," she replied dreamily.

"Liar," Robert chuckled, pulling her closer. Then he pressed a kiss on the side of her head. "But I think I know how we could warm up," he whispered boldly into her ear.

Cora blushed. She opened her mouth to playfully admonish him, but his lips were on her before she could utter a word. Her mouth already open, Robert found an easy access which he exploited in a way he had never dared to before, eliciting a soft moan from Cora's throat as their tongues met.

It was a kiss unlike anything they had ever shared before, and it took all of Robert's self-restraint to break away from Cora before it would go further, for he still remembered that there was nothing but an overgrown hedge and a set of French windows that stood between their expressions of love and a room full of people who enjoyed nothing as much as gossip.

"I think we should go back in," he said with regret in his voice, stealing one more kiss before he forced himself to pull further apart.

"You are probably right," Cora replied, looking flustered as she tried to arrange her skirts.

Robert took her hand in his and stroked it gently.

"Would you mind awfully if we found an excuse to leave early?" he asked, bringing the hand to his lips.

A smile spread on Cora's face and she shook her head. "I wouldn't mind at all," she replied with a hint of mischief in her voice.

"Good, because I think I'm going to need some more warming up tonight," Robert replied with a grin.

With that said, he stood up and offered his hand to Cora, helping her back to her feet. They made their way back into the house together, trying to hide their happy smiles, and if there were any curious looks directed at their joined hands as they moved across the room, or any gasps elicited by a lingering tightness in Robert's trousers, they were blissfully oblivious to it all.

As far as Robert was concerned, he had just entered into his second honeymoon.

He was the luckiest man alive.


End file.
